When God???

Have you ever felt like you were created to do "something"? Have you ever felt like that "something" is going to happen? Have you ever felt like this “something” will be so life giving you couldn’t wait to do it? Have you ever felt like God is telling you to wait? Have you ever felt like during this waiting God was asking you how bad you wanted it? Have you ever felt like God was telling you to go get, go ask, show and argue for what He wants to give you during this waiting?

Well that is me… That is exactly where I find myself. Right in the middle of all those questions I have my answers and more questions… This is where my struggle is. This is where I spend most of my thoughts right now, around all these questions, answers and more questions…

I am struggling with being patient and confident in what I feel like God has created me to do and be. I am apart of something so life giving, it is honestly much more than I ever thought it would be and I feel like eventually it will turn into my career. I know my heart is in this place and my desires are for the future of this place and I am certain I want to follow the leader of this place…BUT… I don’t know if I will be at this place.

I find myself doing a job that pays pretty well, I don’t hate it… BUT I’m not getting energy from it, it isn’t life giving… It is a blessing, it is a great job, I am pretty good at it, but it isn’t what I want to do… It isn’t what I’m designed to do, it isn’t what excites me, it isn’t utilizing the gifts that God has given me…

Isn’t it funny how we can get an answer to prayer, which this job is, but then get to the point where you forget the praise you gave God for it… This is what I am doing… I’m complaining that I don’t have the next step yet, the next phase of my journey and in doing so I have forgotten the gift that is my current job.

So I don’t know what to do… I have this dream that God has given me and I know it is God because it is nothing that I would have ever thought I would want or think I could do, but here I am… Wanting and Thinking…

God I pray that I don’t loose sight of You! That I don’t become a complainer and not continue to praise you for the gift of my current job, where you opened up a opportunity to leave one career path and to put me in a position to do more for Your Kingdom. God I pray that I don’t have to wait too much longer to do what I feel like you have created me to be… Amen!